I woke up this morning feeling awful and not like sick awful but upset awful so I think its time to update and maybe it will help....
Since our last post we have had so many ups and downs! Poor Keagan has suffered from a double ear infection, double eye infection and a sinus infection. So off to the doctor we went! After 7 days of eyedrops and 10 days of augmeton(sp) we went back to the doctor for her second half of her flu shot and a recheck... guess what it wasn't gone! So now she is on a 10 day regimin of Cefdinir and is on Zyrtec for the next 30 days to see if that will help! The two pediatricins that we see both have said its probably time for her to get tubes but since we have an appt next week in IA city they will just wait to see what they have to say since she will have to get her tubes there anyway.
Last week or so we also had our cardiac appointment... Everything looked great! Talk about great news! It was a huge relief that her heart is in great shape and she has many more years in her life to live!
We also have had another therapy appointment and although everything looks great they are all significantly worried that she is suffering from hearing loss. This time we also met with a married couple that specializes with vision, although we do not believe she is currently having any vision issues they came because of the Duane Syndrom she currently suffers from. We won't be seeing them monthly but probably every 3 months or so just to make sure everything continues to be on track. Even they noticed a hearing issue though. As a mom I already feared this and I honestly can't wait til IA City and maybe finally we will get the answers we have been waiting for!
Oh IA City, as our appointment is only days away I think this is why my mood has been changing. Only certian people can completely understand my feelings as this day approaches. Our appt is with the cleft clinic which is made up of a team of doctors to evaluate, test and further diagnose my sweet girl. After all that testing we will also meet with our genetics team to go over their diagnoses for her... oh diagnoses... I honestly don't think I hate a word more than that! I am tired of this roller coaster! I have been soo stressed, anxious, angry, sad and guilty! Part of me wants to throw in the towel and just love Keagan for who she is and who she will be and stop all these tests and doctor appointments but where will that get me... where will that get her :( That little girl is the love of my life and I only want the best for her so I just have to suck it up and put my big girl pants on and deal with it. But that doesn't mean I don't harbor anxiety about it all.
I have had alot of outside stress the last few weeks which isn't helping my situation... some days I want to stomp my feet and throw a temper tantrum like a 5 year old! My entire life revolves around Keagan... I don't like to ask for help, I don't like to ask for things... she is my responsiblity and I am completely ok with that.. Sometimes I just wish people would think before they speak, even when you don't say something directly to me, It still effects me... especially if I can read it somewhere. Also I know I am the parent in the situation but sometimes I wish people would think about me first or at least Keagan... ugh I have enough to think about and stress about.
On a happier note... Keagan currently has 9 teeth and bites!! She doesn't know she is hurting you, she actually thinks its funny to make you hollar OUCH! She loves eating baby food minus green beans (guess she had to get something from her bapa)! Just a few days ago she started crawling and is now all over the place! And just this morning she pulled herself all the way up in her crib and decided to use it as a trampoline! She is such a silly girl! Keagan is getting bigger and smarter everyday, It makes me so proud to be that little girls mama!
Well I hope everyone survives the snowstorm tonight! Be thinking of us Monday as we make the trek to IA City and we have a long day there! Pray for answers and solutions for our sweet baby girl.
